Saturday, October 24, 2009

I Feel The Time Is Coming

I'm starting to feel like I'm not any good at what I do, or, I am at least not nearly as good as I used to be.

I feel like people are thinking of me as a good teacher because of my reputation, not because of my deeds.

I'm tired.

I'm sick of NCLB and watching kids sit through classes that are way beyond their understanding and ability to comprehend and learn.

I'm starting to get sloppy and say things on this blog that should not be said.

I'm sick of everyone who think they know it all but know nothing.

Maybe the Jamaican sunshine and the ice cold Red Stripes will help. I really need that swim up bar. Winter break is too far away.

Maybe it is time for me to say goodbye. I don't want to be one of those old, senile teachers who should have quit 10 years ago. Am I still making a difference or will things be better if I turn the reins to a young newbie?


Liberty Rose said...

Sweetie, Stop this self doubt right this minute!
What has brought on all this worry? I don't know you personally, but know you as a member of my posse... you are carrying the same burdens many of us carry, you are the voice for many, and you make us laugh as ourselves while we shake our fists at the Dark Side.
You are still doing good stuff. Really good stuff. the kids communicate to you openly.... that says it all. Stay in the game. Your time has not yet come.

alex said...

Hey POT:
They have made teaching in the NYC public schools into an idiotic job and a job for an idiot. If you can afford to retire then do it because life is too short.

Grammatically Delicious Designs said...

Just think of one of those kids that you were the only one who cared if they passed or failed. Without you, that life would be drastically different. That's what keeps me going.


Grammatically Delicious Designs said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
burntoutteacher said...

No, no, no, no, you can't let the idiots get you down this way! I have been following your blog for ages and you are what keeps me going each morning. Please look over all the emails you have gotten from your students RECENTLY and know that you are a wonderful teacher, that your students are learning, learning, learning, that they NEED you. What passes for learning in some schools, with mandated mini-lessons, prescribed seating, teaching to a test without developing inquiry skills, and even a ban on homework (I kid you not -- my school is almost there on that one!), you are a true teacher.

mathman42 said...

When all is said and done, the kids who wanted to learn will say you were one of the best and those who just wanted to chill will say you were one of the worst. And for them they will both be correct.

When you go for a year and you can't find a total of ten who wanted to learn, that's the time. ( Just like in the Bible ).

Trust me, it's worse where I am at.

Barbara K said...

I would be sorry to see you go. You are still as good and effective as you ever were. I think this fatigue and self doubt comes from the environment in which you (and many of us) are forced to teach.

I look forward to reading your posts everyday. I am certain you are the kind of teacher I would want as my friend if I were part of your staff.