Friday, March 09, 2007


One of the teachers in my school buried her husband today. They were only married 10 years and he was only 55 years old. He was a terrific guy, the kind of guy that made the sun shine on the cloudiest days. He was always so full of life and energy. Once J walked in the room, everyone was laughing and having fun. My friend not only lost her lover, but she lost her best friend in the world today.

Lots of the teachers in my school wanted to go to the funeral. The church was nearby. Some were able to get coverages. There was a good turn out. The JROTC even provided a color guard. It was wonderful. J was a veteran and earned the honors that he was given.

My AP planned to go to the church. We had even arranged to go together. Ten minutes before we were to leave my phone rang. "Ms PoD, I can't go to the funeral. Principal Suit wants to meet with me now. I will call him and see if I can change the meeting to a later time." Not hearing from him, I called back before I left and got no answer. I assumed he was at the meeting and hoped that everything was going well there. When I returned to the building I went to see him and tell him about it. I also wanted to see if he was okay as he seemed a little upset on the phone. "Would you believe that I went to his office and he wasn't there. I have to go back later anyways!" It seems Principal Suit had a meeting outside the building but never bothered to cancel his meeting with my AP. I guess AP's matter as little to Suit as teachers do.

I don't know what his scheduled meeting was about and I don't know what he was upset about, if he was upset but he mentioned something that I hope is a clue to some of his bizarre and mean behavior lately. He was talking about another AP in my building that was taken out and placed in the Rubber Room. I know this guy's removal has lots of people on edge. If it can happen to one person, it can happen to another person. No one is safe from any of these charges, many of which are trumped up.

When J found out he was dying, he decided he wanted a memorial service instead of a funeral. He wanted people to come and say good things about him. I didn't think we should talk about him when he was gone, so I went ahead and wrote the eulogy and gave it to him. This started a long series of correspondences between us. Lots of his letters were incoherent because he was losing his mind, along with his body, but I know he enjoyed my letters to him. Here is the eulogy I wrote for him, minus the names.

When I first met M, I was on an anti social binge. I had all the friends I wanted—there was no room for anymore. But I felt sorry for her, started talking to her and discovered I liked her a little. Then I met J and it was love at first sound. J has more life in him than anyone I ever met. J talks so much that M told me that during a power failure, the apartment building uses his mouth as a portable generator.

The first time I met J was at a New Year’s Eve party at my house. I remember J was quiet when he first walked in, probably the only time in all the time that I know him that he was ever quiet. I remember being busy that night, but J, in his wonderful, outgoing way, made friends with all of Steve’s friends. In fact, S's friend’s always have a major super bowl party and all we heard was that he should bring J to the party. It took us a while to figure out who they meant since we really did not know him well then.

I got to know J really well at the JROTC balls. J and I would spend the night talking to the kids and taking pictures and socializing while M and S sat like wallflowers on the side. The strange thing about this was that J never met any of these people before, but it did not stop him from talking and from being totally involved with them.

Calling M has always been an experience. I used to try to call when J was at work, because once he answered the phone, no one else could get a word in edgewise. I could never call when I was in a hurry if I knew Johnny was home.

M used to complain about J’s driving all the time. I figured she was exaggerating, until Johnny picked me up one morning to drive me to school for our trip to Florida. A triple loop roller coaster ride would have been calmer than this drive. Now I knew why M liked to sit in the back when he drove. J is one of the most wonderful people I have ever met. I feel honored to have been one of his friends. I will miss him greatly.

Anyways, I didn't start this entry to bitch again. I just wanted to say Goodbye J... Rest in Peace.


Nic said...

What a great idea to give someone their eulogy while they're still around to appreciate it. Good for you, and he sounds like a wonderful friend.

Lsquared said...

I agree with nic, and I want to point out that you missed taking out the names in a couple of places.