If divorce had been fashionable 50 years ago, my in-laws would have never stayed married. I'm glad they did because although they didn't get along, they were both great people and if they lived apart I might not have gotten to know each of them as well as I did. The reason I am writing this now is because even in a bad marriage, loss is painful. I remember when my father-in-law died, my mother-in-law was sad. She missed the other body in the house, the sound of the refrigerator opening, the toilet flushing, making another person something to eat. My dad keeps talking about how lost he is after 58 wonderful years. I try to tell him to hold on to his memories. He would be sad if it was 58 miserable years. He is the lucky one. Not too many people have the luxury of hanging on to the memories he has.
3 comments:
"...even in a bad marriage, loss is painful."
I'll hold on to these words and ponder them deeply. I'm in a bad marriage. (Why should I try to prettify what's ugly?) But when I think of leaving, I feel some pain coming on. Maybe your words are truer than you knew...
Thank you for this one little phrase.
I send yu my prayers to find some happiness.
my grandmother (may she rest in peace) was the same way when my grandpa passed away in March of 2007. She was just very unhappy all of the time and kept on saying, "Take me with him. I want to be with my husband".
They were married for 62 years and it is a big loss so it is understandable.
However my grandpa was just fine after my other grandma passed away in 2005. He kept busy, was active in Florida and called his children over what he was cooking for dinner 3 months in advance.
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