Several years ago, a good friend refused to have a typical retirement party. Instead, she invited friends to a party in her home, a party she paid for. This seemed like a great idea at the time. The hitch--every guest was asked (by another friend) to chalk up $50 to help pay for a watch she wanted. So much for paying for your own party.
I have lots of reasons for not following the typical route, but the scenario above is my number one reason. Anyone who cares about me can go out and have a drink (even a glass of juice if they don't imbibe) in my honor.