Thanksgiving Day

Thanksgiving day, another day taking my dad to visit my mom. These trips are getting easier. He didn't even cry today and thanks to access-a-ride, he can spend the entire day here and get a ride home, saving us the trip.

Passover is the special holiday I remember with my mom. Thanksgiving was reserved for my mother-in-law. Every year, since 1985, the year my father-in-law died, we picked her up early and brought her to our house to spend the holiday. She was an eccentric character and I loved her both in spite of and because of her eccentricities. (I won't say what her worst one was except that I could never take her shopping.)

Every year, she would join me and my children as we hiked through Alley Pond Park, enjoying all the beauty nature has to offer this time of year in our own back yard. She loved watching the kids jump in the leaves and run up and down the ramp underneath the highway. All the while, her son, would sit at home and watch his football games in peace.

After our walk (and some cooking) we always took my daughter to a movie. It was a great girls' only bonding day. My kids always say that I was more like her than I was like my own mother. Maybe that is what attracted my husband to me in the first place.

Until today, I forgot how much I enjoyed spending the holidays with her. I think it must have been the fallen red leaves on my mom's grave that reminded me of how much I loved my other mom.

Thanksgiving

The only reason I look forward to Thanksgiving is the two days off from work. Not having a big family to celebrate with makes the holiday quiet, often boring and sad. Even my daughter decided not to celebrate with us this year. Her boyfriend has a wonderful, big family and she is having the celebration I always wanted. As I sit watching the news and seeing all the unfortunates in the soup kitchens I know I should be counting my blessings instead of weeping in my tea. But, sometimes a person just cannot help feeling sad.

Today is my parent's sixty first wedding anniversary. I began the day by taking my dad to visit her grave. The cemetery is in New Jersey and he is one of those octogenarians who knows his limitations behind the wheel and never makes the drive alone. It would have been too hard for him to be there alone. I picked him up at 7:15 and managed to be back in Queens by 10:00, beating all the holiday traffic.

I knew that today would be especially hard on him so I was thrilled when he agreed to come home with me. We had breakfast in a nearby diner (which he really liked) and then just vegged around my house all day. He watched the Macy's parade and some I Love Lucy reruns while I cooked. We tried to make sure he was busy and had no time to dwell on my mom's not being here.

Dinner was good, if I do say so myself. Lots of turkey, meatballs, homemade cranberry sauce, stuffing, and all the other goodies. I even made an apple pie. Dad is on his way home now, thank you Access-A Ride. [He just called. he got picked up by a private car and made it home in record time.] He might cry a little more tonight, but at least his day was good.

Everything is cleaned up, the leftovers are put away. Now, do I mark my test papers, plan some lessons, write the few college recommendations I have left or find some stupid television show to fall asleep in front of? The two guys in the picture have the right idea about how to spend their time.

Jury Duty and Other Stuff

I'm on jury duty. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be here so bad that I would pick a PD day instead. I really shouldn't complain. It is only the second time in my long life that I have had to serve. For years I used child care as an excuse. Even when my son was 16, I claimed he needed his mommy around to get excused. I couldn't believe that it worked,

The last time I was called was six years ago. It was in criminal court. Some stupid woman brought her baby. The court officer yelled "Don't you know there are rapists and murderers in this building. It is not safe for a baby." I thought, "Hell, it's not safe for me either. I've got to get out." I got put on a panel--an African American male was accused of trying to murder his wife. The lawyers questioning perspective jurors made him sound guilty. His legal aid lawyer did nothing. I felt he was convicted before the trial even began. When the judge asked, "Can you make a fair decision?" I answered "NO". I calmly told him that in this country Black men do not always get fair trials. I had just seen the movie Hurricane and was still upset about the way that man had been treated by the law. The judge screamed at me and threw me out. I don't mind getting yelled at if the end result is what I want.

Now I am back. It's civil court this time, which is a whole lot better. They even have computers here. I didn't know that so I brought along my own lap top. We'll probably be sitting here all day, but I don't think we'll have to come back Friday. My husband drove me here this morning. He's nuts about not being late and nothing I said could convince him that it did not matter. People walked in up to two hours late with no penalties. The court officer asked if anyone had a summons that did not start on November 16. You would not believe how many people got up and told him that theirs started on that day. So much for jurors with common sense. I handed in my paper work, went for coffee and a bagel and am back being a good citizen.

I'm sure my classes won't miss me too much. One of my AP calculus classes had a test scheduled for today. I left it with a friend to give them and I told them they would take it with our without me. They are good kids. I just spoke to the friend. He said all went well. The other AP class will get to work on their Thanksgiving take-home test. I give them tons of take-home tests because it forces them to work together and study more. I give plenty of in class stuff to separate the real students from the wooses. My Math B classes will probably be partying. They've been wild all week so I guess we can all use a day apart.

My son got home yesterday, my daughter will be coming in tomorrow and my sister got in last night from Texas to spend two weeks with my dad. Between Thanksgiving, the time he and my mom usually went to Florida and the approach of what would have been his 59th anniversary, it will be a hard time. I'm glad she is around to ease his burden. We are all spending the holiday together at my house tomorrow. My son is upset because I only bought a turkey breast this year instead of an entire turkey. Hopefully when he tastes it and all his other favorite stuff, he will be happy. If not,tough. I could have bought him a tofurkey (which I would have preferred.)

Happy Thanksgiving to all! Don't overeat. Enjoy your school free holiday.